Lyrics

From THE WIZARD OF CLAUS: THE MUSICAL

SALLY has just pulled the Frozen, Magic, Un-meltable Shovel out of the statue. DRY CLEAN ONLY is getting exhausted from trudging through the snow, and fears he doesn’t have the energy to make it all the way to the City of Claus to warn THE WIZARD about KRAMPUS. He brainstorms ideas on the best method to get there. Since he has “snow-for-brains,” SALLY tries to offer guidance.
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SHOVEL A PATH TO CLAUS
(Music and lyrics by Jason Bravo)

DRY CLEAN ONLY
THERE ARE MANY WAYS
TO GET SOMEWHERE:
BY CAR, BY HORSE, BY SLEIGH.

SALLY
BUT JUDGING BY THE LOOKS OF IT,
THAT WON’T QUITE WORK TODAY.

AND WE NEED SOMETHING CONCRETE
TO CLEAR THE ROAD BENEATH OUT FEET.

DRY CLEAN ONLY
BUT THIS THINKING BURNS MY BRAIN:
THE POSSIBILITIES ARE INSANE!

I’VE GOT IT!: WE CAN PUSH THE SNOW
WITH A PINKIE TOE
INCH BY INCE, MILE BY MILE.

SALLY
HOLD ON! THAT MIGHT TAKE AWHILE.

(DRY CLEAN ONLY puts his “ear” to the ground, trying to push the snow.)

SALLY
YOU CAN’T DO IT WITH YOUR EAR.
LISTEN TO WHAT I SAY.
AM I MAKING MYSELF CLEAR?
NO, NO, NO! THAT AIN’T THE WAY.

DRY CLEAN ONLY
YOU COULD USE YOUR KNEES.

SALLY
MY KNEES WOULD FREEZE!

DRY CLEAN ONLY
I DIDN’T KNOW. MY APOLOGIES!
YOU COULD USE YOUR NOSE. OKAY?

SALLY
IXNAY!
NO, NO. THAT WOULD TAKE ALL DAY.

(SALLY nods to the shovel, trying to give DRY CLEAN ONLY a clue as kindly as possible, knowing he’s not too bright.)

WE’VE GOT TO SHOVEL SHOVEL
SHOVEL A PATH TO—
SHOVEL SHOVEL SHOVEL A PATH TO—
SHOVEL SHOVEL SHOVEL A PATH TO CLAUS.

DRY CLEAN ONLY
(clueless) With a shovel?!

SALLY
SHOVEL SHOVEL SHOVEL A PATH TO—
SHOVEL SHOVEL SHOVEL A PATH TO—
SHOVEL SHOVEL SHOVEL A PATH TO CLAUS.

DRY CLEAN ONLY
With a shovel?!
I don’t quite get it.

SALLY
YOU CAN’T SHOVEL WITH A TEASPOON.
SAVE THE TEASPOONS FOR YOUR TEA
UNLESS YOU WANNA TAKE A YEAR
TO MAKE IT TO YOUR DESTINY.

DRY CLEAN ONLY
(trying to help, thinking he has a brilliant idea)
YOU CAN PUSH THE SNOW
WITH YOUR HAND, YOU KNOW.

SALLY
THAT’S WAY TOO COLD
AND WAY TOO SLOW!
YOU DON’T USE A SNAIL TO RUN A RACE,
NOT IF YOU WANNA WIN FIRST PLACE.

WE’VE GOT TO SHOVEL SHOVEL
SHOVEL A PATH TO—
SHOVEL SHOVEL SHOVEL A PATH TO—
SHOVEL SHOVEL SHOVEL A PATH TO CLAUS.

DRY CLEAN ONLY
With a shovel?!

SALLY
SHOVEL SHOVEL SHOVEL A PATH TO—
SHOVEL SHOVEL SHOVEL A PATH TO—
SHOVEL SHOVEL SHOVEL A PATH TO CLAUS.

DRY CLEAN ONLY
With a shovel?!

SALLY
With a shovel!

DRY CLEAN ONLY
I THINK I’M GETTING IT.
I THINK I UNDERSTAND.
GOTTA GET TO THE WIZARD
AS FAST AS WE CAN.

SALLY
REMEMBER THAT A SMILE
IS A FROWN UPSIDE DOWN
AND SOMETIMES A VERB
IS ALSO A NOUN.
LET’S GO TO—
LET’S GO TO—

SALLY and DRY CLEAN ONLY
LET’S GO TO TOWN!

HAMMER WITH A HAMMER.
BACK YOUR BACK AGAINST A WALL.
BRUSH YOUR HAIR WITH A BRUSH.
WANNA CALL ME? MAKE A CALL.
WHEN YOU WALK, WALK THAT WALK.
WHEN YOU TALK, TALK THAT TALK.
PADDLE WITH A PADDLE.

SALLY
BOW WITH A BOW.
AND WITH A SHOVEL?!

DRY CLEAN ONLY
Yeah, now I know!

SALLY and DRY CLEAN ONLY
WE’VE GOT TO SHOVEL SHOVEL
SHOVEL A PATH TO—
SHOVEL SHOVEL SHOVEL A PATH TO—
SHOVEL SHOVEL SHOVEL A PATH TO CLAUS.

With a shovel!

SHOVEL SHOVEL SHOVEL A PATH TO—
SHOVEL SHOVEL SHOVEL A PATH TO—
SHOVEL SHOVEL SHOVEL A PATH TO CLAUS.

With a shovel!